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My Obstacle Course: Engage, Encourage and Empower

A fun, structured, systematic way to work on your child's strengths and weaknesses at home!

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Treasure Hunting for Apple Themed Station Items

When I think of September, I think apples!! (Although at the grocery store this morning they were stocking Halloween candy – seriously?? Perhaps I’m just way behind.) Back to apples… there’s apple picking, apple cider, apple pie, etc. Just as there are lots of ways to eat and drink apples, there are also many apple themed station activities that can be used in My Obstacle Courses. In this post I will share some materials that I have used to help me with this theme. Over the next few weeks, I will also share how I have used them in the past and how I will use them this year with Andrew. I will also explain how they can be modified to build skills at various skill levels.

As with every themed My Obstacle Course I put together, I begin with a “treasure hunt” around my house to see if there is anything I can use. In my hunt, I looked for anything that was red, yellow and green representing the colors of apples.

Treasure Hunt Treasures

Here are some things I found:

  • apple calendar cutouts
  • apple mini die-cutouts
  • red index cards
  • red, yellow and green colored puffs
  • a red plastic ball
  • books about apples
  • apple shaped note paper
  • apple stickers
  • apple calendar numbers
  • applesauce
  • real and decorative apples
Apple Calendar Cut-Outs, Numbers and Red Index Cards
Apple Themed Books
Apple Stickers
Apple Themed Mini Cut-Outs

If you are interested in some of these items but don’t know where to get them, here is the link to an “apple” search I did at Creative Teaching Press and also one I did for my favorite local teacher store, Teacher Heaven. (Note – I have no affiliation with either of these companies, I just want to share where I get my materials so if you’d like to have the same materials you can get them.) I have purchased thematic materials like this over the years and since these are only used during our My Obstacle Courses, I am able to bring them out each year and use them in new ways according to the skills and concepts Andrew is ready for.

I would love to hear from you about what skills you are working on with your child so I can post on station activities that are helpful for your child!! As always, you can email me at obstaclecoursemom@yahoo.com or post on my My Obstacle Course Facebook wall.

Engage, Encourage and Empower!

 

 

Back To School Tip #7

Decoding the Teacher’s Weekly Letter

I’m sure that most of you get a letter at the beginning of the week from your child’s teacher explaining the themes, concepts and skills they are working on in class. This is an important way for them to communicate with you what they are teaching your child in school. This letter is also a great way for you to get ideas for how to reinforce what they are doing in school at home. How can you do this? Through simple station activities as part of My Obstacle Course!

My mission is to help parents “engage, encourage and empower” their children and what better way to do that than by reinforcing what they are working on in school in a fun way in order to strengthen the connections and knowledge. When I began doing this with Andrew, he would always look at me with one eyebrow up, like “How do you know about this stuff?” It helped me to see firsthand what vocabulary he understood, gave me specific examples of how he applied his knowledge and understanding and also gave him some extra time to build skills in a safe, loving environment – our home!

Here are some sample letters I have saved from Andrew’s classes over the years and some ways I would use them:

Sample 1
Sample 1, other side of paper

Sample 1 is clearly an “Ocean” themed week, so I would treasure hunt for ocean related items to include. I would look for books, bath toys, kitchen items that could be used to encourage water play. I would also try to find pictures to go with the vocabulary words they were working on to help reinforce the word and the meaning.

Sample 2

For Sample 2, I would include alphabet related activities to reinforce “Chicka-Chicka Boom Boom.” We have the book so I would use that as part of a read aloud or fluency station. For math, I would work do a matching station with a certain number of letters (to reinforce literacy) matched up with that number for one-one correspondence. I’d also play a game where we try to see how many different ways we can make a certain number (ex. for the number 10 – 1+9, 2+8, 3+7, 2×5 (two groups of five – never too early to begin working on multiplication 🙂 ), 11-1, etc.).

Sample 3

Sample 3 is obviously working on building literacy skills so I would be utilizing word cards and letters to build these words (see ideas below). A chalkboard, white board or MagnaDoodle would be great for a station where they are writing their spelling words.

Sample 4

Sample 4 screams out “Crawl and Match” for me. I would either write the compound word parts on separate cards or print them out a little larger and then cut them apart. I would place the beginning part of the word on one end of the carpet runner and the other half of the word on the other end of the runner so he could get the word part, crawl down and match it with the correct ending. I would not do all of these as one activity – way too many, but may do two separate stations – the “Crawl and Match” and then maybe “Clothesline Clipping” the word parts together.

General Activity Suggestions:

Letter Recognition

  • Matching
  • Sorting
  • Clothesline clipping uppercase and lowercase letters together
  • Sensory bin with letters (scrabble, magnet, tiles, beads)

Building Receptive and Expressive Vocabulary

  • www.EnchantedLearning.com is a great resource for thematic vocabulary with pictures to go with the words
  • Matching words and pictures
  • Sorting pictures by category

Spelling or Word Study Words

  • Using Scrabble or Bananagram letters to create the words
  • Word matching game (like memory match but with the same word written on two separate cards to match together)
  • Word sorting according to patterns (pairs well with “Crawl and Sort” to encourage physical movement while building literacy skills)
  • Putting words in ABC order (starting with a few if this is a new concept while also providing the written alphabet for reference)

Read Aloud Station

  • Read by you to build listening stamina and skills like sitting in one place, staying quiet, listening for information, retelling, etc.
  • Easily combined with comprehension questions – who? what? when? where? why? how? – which can be written on a beach ball to pass back and forth or written on cards for the child to flip. Either way helps to build question and answer skills.
  • The public library is a great resource for themed books. Call and ask the librarians to pull books based on a certain theme for a certain reading level. I would give them a few days to pull them and if you don’t want to make lots of trips, I’d ask your child’s teacher what the themes/concepts will be for the next few weeks to save you time.

Fluency Practice

  • Fluency is building reading skills through short passages so that it comes out smooth, clear, with expression and taking note of punctuation. If you start with material that is too difficult, it will be choppy as they work to decode the words. Start with passages that they can read easily, even if it is the ABC’s, so that they build their confidence.
  • This is fun with a toy microphone (I’m thinking of the plastic ones that echo and are sold at the Dollar Store.), paper towel tube as microphone (I’ve even seen people put tin foil over the top to mimic a real one.), or even recording them so they can listen to themselves

Math Fact Practice

  • Dice
  • Playing cards
  • Dominos (adding or subtracting the two sides together)
  • Combining flash cards with manipulatives to make sure they are getting a good understanding of the concept

Unit Studies in SS or Science

  • Treasure hunt at home to see if there is anything you can find to help reinforce this (books, toys, pretend play items, etc.)
These suggestions are based on general skills or concepts that tend to be sent home for practice. There are obviously many more, and if you have some that you’d like me to post on ways to make it more fun and engaging, let me know! I love this stuff!! obstaclecoursemom@yahoo.com

Engage, Encourage and Empower!

Back To School Tip #6

I have a few questions for you.

  • Do you want to do My Obstacle Course activities with your child but you have other children to tend to?
  • Do you wish you could have another set of hands while doing the station activities with your child?
  • Do you wish you could have some help preparing the stations or have help watching your child while you set up the stations?

I assure you that you are not alone. This is how I know (except for the “other children” part, which I have heard from other parents 🙂 )…

When Andrew was 4 and had been diagnosed with autism (pdd-nos) and apraxia of speech, it seemed that all of the other parents I talked with took their children to a program nearby designed to build developmental skills. They also had people from this program coming to their houses on days when they weren’t in therapy to work one on one with their child. I looked into this and it cost A LOT of money to have someone (usually a student or intern) working one on one with a child as well as having them come to the house. It just didn’t seem right that I should pay someone a therapist’s fee to work on basic skills that I could do at home. That said, I gladly pay the professionals that work with Andrew to use their knowledge and expertise to help move him forward. I also realize that students and interns have to learn and train, I just don’t want to pay them the same amount I’d pay a professional, even if they are carrying out the professional’s plan. But that’s just my opinion.

I looked at the skills that one particular family was working on in this program and they were so basic, I knew I could do it. At the time, I didn’t know how to make it so he’d want to work with “Mom” doing the activities (this is how My Obstacle Course came to be – so that I could work with him and have him be willing to work with me 🙂 ) but that didn’t stop me because I thought, surely since I was a teacher I should be able to do this. Now I know that I didn’t have to be a teacher – ANYONE who cares about your child can do this, which is what I hope to convey through this website and the station activity ideas I share!

When we began, my primary focus was on building his play skills and I did think it would be a good idea to have an extra set of hands to help me but didn’t want to wait until my husband came home from work. Where was I going to find someone:

  • responsible?
  • who could drive to our house?
  • who wasn’t going to cost me an arm and a leg?
  • and most importantly, who would be understanding and respectful of the interesting things that sometimes arise when working with a child who has developmental delays?

Having been in the school of education myself and having had several student teachers while I was teaching, I know that there are tons of students in education or therapy programs who are looking for a few hours of work while also getting experience applying what they are learning with children.

Post an ad at local colleges or universities that have education and/or therapy programs.

Working with a student is not only a huge help for you as a parent or caregiver, it helps them to see the family side of the children that they will be working with. This provides them with a different perspective of some challenges we face, how hard we work and how much joy we experience with even the smallest gains. I have seen them come in fairly timid and unsure of what to expect but after working together, they learn the importance of high expectations, laughter and learning through play. They are also just as excited when something we have been working on for a while finally sinks in!

If you are feeling overwhelmed and want someone to help you with your child’s skill building or if just want an extra set of hands like I did, I encourage you to reach out to any local education programs (or even ask or post something at your therapy location) to see if anyone is looking for extra hours.

Sample Request:

I am the mother of an 8-year-old son who has autism, apraxia of speech and ADHD. I live in the 100 Acre Woods area and am looking for someone interested in education or autism/speech related therapies (OT, SLP) who is willing to help me work with him at our home to build developmental and academic skills. Patience, understanding and a good sense of humor is a must! Activities for our sessions will be provided at first but I may ask you to help me prepare them in the future. You can get an idea of what sorts of things we’ll be doing from www.myobstaclecourse.com and can also get your own ideas from there once you know what we are working on. I am looking for 2 hours a week and pay $15 an hour (the going rate for babysitters in our area) and $10 for gas (since I’ll need you to drive to our home). Email me if you are interested and we’ll set up a time to meet.

I found someone through a teacher at Andrew’s school who also happened to teach a course on Early Childhood Development. I had mentioned that I was looking for some help and she emailed my request to the students in her class. The girl who responded was in the early intervention education program and was willing to come to our house once a week for 2 hours. She worked with me, watched me fumble around as I figured out what worked and didn’t work with Andrew at home (you all are benefiting from these fumbles 🙂 ), got to know Andrew, and got experience doing My Obstacle Courses with us that she eventually put to use in her early childhood class at a nearby elementary school. (She also became a babysitter I could trust so that my husband and I could go out for an occasional adults only dinner.)

Our "helper" watching Andrew count the stickers.

Why have a student help you at home?

  • Purposeful one on one time with your child at home without breaking the bank.
  • Sometimes it helps to have an extra set of hands, especially when working on ball skills and turn taking.
  • Someone to help with prepping materials, setting up stations or watching your child while you do this.
  • Share the amazing experience of your child with someone else.
If you have someone working with you and your child and they are looking for some direction, I encourage you to pass on this website so they can browse the skills your child is ready for and help you to create some activities. My intention for posting the station activities is to give you some ideas of what it can look like in a home setting to build different skills and concepts in a fun, thematic way. No fancy stuff required, just some knowledge of where your child is, a little creativity and thinking about things in a slightly different way.

Engage, Encourage and Empower!

 

 

Back To School Tip #5

As parents and caregivers, there are always going to be things that we do for our children that may not be the most fun for us (carpool, sports practices, waiting rooms, etc.) but that doesn’t mean that these things have to be completely unpleasant.

I learned that by adding some things that I really enjoyed or wanted to do, I began to look at things like time in the waiting room, driving carpool, etc. as a gift of time where I had to do something for me instead of being trapped in an annoying situation. I still take Andrew to therapies and drive him to school but I go with such a different attitude because I’m getting something out of it too!

Things I’ve added:

  • audio books
  • MP3 recordings of classes that interest me (TED Talks are also a favorite!)
  • Headphones – noise canceling or ear buds
  • My new favorite app called Brain Wave which has soothing sounds (ocean, rain, white noise) along with sound waves to encourage different brain states – relaxation, focus, energy, deep sleep (great for bedtime, not so great in the waiting room 🙂 ).
  • iPhone/iPad with my favorite music and movies
  • DVD player with a favorite DVD or even one rented from the library that you’ve been dying to see
  • Favorite pen/pencil and journal to write thoughts, ideas, lists, etc.
  • A beverage – flavored sparkling water or iced lattes are my favorites these days!
  • Favorite catalogs or magazines (I even bring a file folder and tear out things that make me feel good to use to create a vision board. A vision board is a collage of pictures and phrases that make one happy to look at. It’s not necessarily about “things” you’d like to have but more about the feeling you get when looking at something. As you can see from my personal board, for me, the colors of autumn and the contrast of cold snow and cozy interiors really speaks to my soul.)
My vision board made from phrases and pictures that make me happy.

Think of something that would make you feel a little bit spoiled and it may turn an ordinary, boring experience into a little treat time for you!

*I wish I were a massage therapist because I think that it would be a huge success to offer pampering services like neck and shoulder massages at therapy locations. I’ve seen these massage chairs in car wash waiting rooms, the mall and at the airport, how perfect would it be to offer this to people while their children have therapy!! Even just 10 minutes would make a huge difference for stressed caregivers.

Something For Siblings

Since Andrew is an only child, I don’t have anyone else to bring with me but if you do, you could also apply these same strategies for them – perhaps a special backpack with things they are only allowed to do when taking brother or sister to therapies or practices. Kind of like when I’m planning for a trip, I gather favorite catalogs, games and snacks to make this time more pleasant.

I encourage you to do something to take a little of the burden off of yourself and add some joy. This is about adding or making small changes to make a difference in your life and if you do it enough, your life will start to be filled with things that bring you so much joy and peace even while sitting in a therapy waiting room.

Engage, Encourage and Empower!

Note: This idea is something I learned from the book, The Joy Diet by Dr. Martha Beck and is part of a strategy she calls “The 3 B’s – Better It, Barter It or Bag It.” This tip is how I have implemented the “better it” strategy in an area of my life that was boring and blah. The vision board is an idea I learned from her book, Finding Your Own North Star.

Back To School Tip #4

In honor of Andrew’s first day back to school, I thought I would share how I combine what I have learned over the years as a teacher and what I have learned as his mother in order to build good working relationships with the members of his “team.” 

Working With Teachers and Therapists

I am a firm believer in meeting your child where they are developmentally and academically if you want to help them progress. I found that this got a little more tricky when Andrew started school because he wasn’t talking so I couldn’t know what he knew with regards to knowledge typically expressed verbally and he clearly wasn’t developing according to some of the timelines that we were seeing. What was he ready for? Where was he developmentally and academically? What were his strengths? What were his weaknesses? Where do we start?

All of these questions were swirling in our minds with no one able to figure it out, that is until I began doing My Obstacle Course with him and presenting him with opportunities to demonstrate his knowledge and understanding in ways that didn’t require words. As a result of doing these station activities with him, I learned where he was with regards to strengths and weaknesses in developmental and academic skills. This was so helpful because I had specific examples to share with his teachers and therapists without it just being “I think he can do this because one time he did it a few months back.” (Yes, I’m sure those exact words have come out of my mouth while sitting in one of the early intervention meetings years ago.) The information I could provide to a teacher or therapist was going to help him and would make such a difference in how they worked with him.

First Day of School 2009

Building The Team

When I work with other parents many of them ask me how his teachers took it when I told them what to do. “Weren’t they mad/offended/insulted?” The thing is that I DID NOT tell his teachers what to do, I told them what Andrew could or could not do. It was up to them how they proceeded with incorporating that knowledge into their teaching. I want to work with them, let them know I am going to do all that I can to support his education and growth and part of that involves giving the information that I had access to so they could use it in planning lessons/sessions to meet his needs.

With his teachers, I did this at the beginning of the year so there wasn’t any time wasted trying to figure out where they should start and what he needed to work on. Since I was a teacher, I know how much time is spent trying to figure out where the students are in all of the different areas. Throw in some learning differences and developmental delays and they may not get the whole picture of what a child can do, especially if the areas of weakness are more noticeable (like being non-verbal) and the areas of strength more subtle (like being able to read before talking). I feel that sharing information is so important in order to have everyone working towards similar goals.

I consider everyone who is part of Andrew’s life, part of his “team” and want to make sure everyone is on the same page. I am sharing my child with them and I want them to know that he is my baby, he has people who love him, who care for him and who have very high hopes for him. No, I’m not the irritating mother who thinks her child is perfect and can do no wrong so I also want them to know that we know he is not perfect, that he can be annoying (ask anyone who works with him how they feel about ceiling fans :)!), that we acknowledge the challenging days that they may experience but that we are doing the best that we can. Conveying that message to his teachers and therapists has always been so important to me and I think it is key to having a good relationship with the members of his team.

First Day of School 2010

What I Share:

When I go in for a parent meeting at the beginning of the school year (you can schedule these with your child’s teachers, you don’t have to wait for conferences!), I share with his teachers where he is in the following areas:

  • fine motor
  • gross motor
  • social
  • literacy
  • math
  • sensory
  • play skills

Some other helpful tidbits to pass on:

How does your child learn best?

Are they visual and have to see things? Do they have to hear it to remember it? Or do they have to touch and manipulate it in order to make sense of it?

Are there any modifications that have worked in the past?

Timers, visual schedules, checklists, fine motor tools, specific room placement (front, end, away from distracting window, etc.), proximity to teacher, less visual distractions in the classroom, squishy seat or exercise ball instead of a chair, fidget toy in desk to keep hands busy, quiet/safe spot/time out (in a good way) space for them to go when they get overwhelmed

How are they motivated?

Positive words, rewards to work for, sticker charts, etc. Andrew is particularly motivated by knowing how many times he’ll have to do something or how much he has to do and so I’ve seen therapists use a set of items that get taken away as he does what he is supposed to do (Ex. 5 coins are set out. Each time he says a speech word or sound 10 times accurately, a coin goes in the bank. This provides him with all modalities of learning – visual, auditory and kinesthetic, while also creating purpose.)

What are things they really enjoy and feel good about?

Giving teachers some insight into what your child likes to do can really help them connect with them. Sharing about a specific hobby or interest is like a “fast pass” to building relationships with students. I’ve had students who were crazy about horses, African Gray Parrots, Okapi’s, planets, presidents, baseball stats, and maps. As I am writing this, I can picture each of those children and how they lit up whenever we would talk about those things. Right now Andrew is into ceiling fans so he may act like he cannot hear you, mention that you have a ceiling fan in your house and the questions will come pouring out faster than you can answer. Plus, he’ll probably want to come over and video tape them 🙂 .

What are things that cause them frustration or anxiety?

This is also so helpful for a teacher to know up front so they can be prepared with some extra motivators or they can make the decision to approach something in a different way to see if that helps ease the frustration a bit.

As for anxiety, this is something that we have dealt with a lot and it has helped his teachers to know what our routine is at home during a situation that may cause anxiety, such as seeing insects inside or when there is a thunderstorm. Ex. If there is a thunderstorm at school he has noise canceling headphones, moves to a location where the lightning cannot be seen – even if that means under a blanket, and soothing music on an I Touch. Sharing the strategies that have worked for us helps him because there is consistency and also comfort in knowing that the teachers respond right away in a calm manner instead of trying to figure out after the fact why he is physically shaking and trying to run away.

First Day of School 2011

I hope that this helps gives you some ideas for how to approach building and working with your child’s “team” in a way that is most productive and helpful for your child’s learning and development.

Engage, Encourage and Empower!

Back To School Tip #3

How Do You Want Your Morning To Feel?

This is the most important tip in my mind. Take a few minutes and think about how you want your mornings to feel. If your mornings are great and peaceful, than awesome! If they are causing you to feel stressed or rushed, think about what things have caused your stress in the past. Personally, I used to feel like a pinball that had been shot out into the day at the mercy of whatever issue or need I bumped into. No sense of control whatsoever!

What I didn’t realize was that this was the way I was feeling because I wasn’t leading my day, it was leading me. I discovered that I could change this by thinking about what I wanted the day to feel like and what I needed to do to make that happen, keeping in mind that Andrew was still going to be Andrew with his ceiling fan questions and comments.

Oh, the Lessons Unpleasant Experiences Teach Me!!

I will be totally honest with you , I am SOOOO not a perfect mother by any means. The tip I share above is purely based on what I learned because of our own unpleasant morning experiences (isn’t that how you learn anything?). This strategy is tied in with one of the most important things that I have learned as a person and parent and while I didn’t learn it until this year, I am so grateful to have learned it because it has made an enormous difference in my life, in my relationship with Andrew and how we move through our days.

Lessons From Horses

I had an experience working with some horses at a retreat back in March with Dr. Martha Beck (who I am training with to be a Life Coach – details about that coming soon!!) and Koelle Simpson, Master Coach and Horse Whisperer. (Click here to watch them work with Sarah Ferguson, the Duchess of York as part of Finding Sarah on the OWN network.) While the original purpose of the retreat was to build personal leadership skills, the HUGE lesson I walked away with was how my energy, thoughts and feelings have an immediate impact on everything around me because that is what they respond to and this carried over with Andrew. The horses pick up on everything, including any nervousness, anxiety, fear and what they actually want to know is who is leading the herd, essentially who is keeping them safe and fed – just like our children!

Getting the horse going in the direction I chose.

It was a powerful lesson of leading by a) knowing what I want or how I want something to feel, b) taking action to make it happen and c) not getting anxious, tense, obsessive or overly excited when making it happen. I learned that while I cannot control other people (especially Andrew!), I can begin to notice how I am feeling when I am with him, control how I am thinking and responding to those feelings and ask myself some key questions

  • What is his behavior telling me?
  • What do I need to do to lead the situation?
  • How can I set boundaries to make sure I do not get tangled in his drama?

This is like building a muscle, it is challenging at first but as my ability to not react to his tantrums has gotten better, the tantrums have gotten shorter because he has no one to feed them. (This also works with people who are angry with you – if you don’t give their anger any fuel, their anger is contained within them, which may irritate them but keeps you out of it 🙂 !)

Joining up!

Back To the Real World

I felt the change in me with the horses but I wasn’t sure how this would actually work with Andrew and all I have to say that it was a crazy experience that proved what I learned. If I was stressed, he became stressed. If I was feeling chaotic and disorganized, he picked up on that and become flustered. If I was relaxed and feeling okay even when things weren’t going smoothly, he was relaxed as well. Amazing! This leads me to my “back to school” tip – How Do I Want the Morning to Feel? First I had to be honest with myself and identify what the problem was, what had been keeping me from having the morning I wanted?

My Problem

I noticed that mornings were particularly stressful and took notice of what was going on. This is what I found (I’m sure none of you can relate so just humor me and pretend 🙂 ):

I would leave lunch-making and backpack packing until the morning and become distracted with my computer (often putting the final touches on these posts 🙂 ). All of a sudden, I would look at the clock and start running around like a chicken with her head cut off, unable to focus on all of the things that suddenly needed to happen all at once. I would be harping on him to “Get going! We gotta leave in 2 minutes!!” He would dance around, fish lip at me (the face he makes when he is stressed and overwhelmed), follow me around repeating the same thing over and over again and I would loudly remind him (while trying to throw together a lunch he’d eat) that going to school naked was not an option. We always made it but I was usually sweating, anxious about getting there on time and he would pick up on that and worry about getting to school on time.

My Solution:

Preparation

I realized all of the frantic energy I was putting out there during this time. I thought about what was going on during the morning that was causing me to be rushed. I thought about what it would look like if I could have the ideal morning. I then thought about what I could do the night before to make the mornings flow better. For me, it was packing his lunch and having the things that needed to be refrigerated packed and only needing to be placed in the lunchbox. I would make sure his backpack was ready to go with any notes needing to go back to school in his binder. I made sure that my phone, keys and wallet were together and ready to grab.

Prioritize

I also realized that it would be helpful to do all that I wanted to do to make the morning feel the way I wanted before getting onto something that was not necessary or could wait. That meant getting us fed and dressed before even opening the computer. If a post didn’t get done by the time I left, I learned that it was okay. If my bed wasn’t made, not a big deal! It became more important to calm down, be more relaxed, take lead of the morning before it led me. This had an amazing effect on all of us and I can honestly state that our mornings are SO much more peaceful than they used to be.

The Takeaway

If there are times of your day that are stressful for you, I encourage you to think of how you can lead this time (NOTE – I do not say control) with a) how you want that time to feel, b) what you can do to make that happen (even small changes make a huge difference!) and c) keeping your own energy calm to not feed into others drama.

Engage, Encourage and Empower!

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